I know that I am beloved

Becoming: “Being the Beloved is the origin and the fulfillment of the life of the Spirit.” Source: “Life of the Beloved”, by Henri J. M. Nouwen {All marked with quotations is either from this book, or the words of Jesus.}

The Life, Death and Resurrection cycle of all things. There is wisdom hidden in all the cycles and seasons.

During Holy Week we are given time to reflect on the gift of Jesus’ life. There is an often-hidden gift in the gift of his words and life. Let us ruminate of some of these. At the Last Supper we see the pattern or cycle of “Take, Bless, Brake & Give”. Let us take a deeper look at this. “I am called to become bread for the world: bread that is taken, blessed, broken and given.”

Taken: “To become the Beloved we first of all, have to claim that we are taken.” “The first step in the spiritual life is to acknowledge with our whole being that we already have been taken.”

We often hear the word “chosen”. How do we know that we are chosen or taken? In our own present and personal reality how is it that we are so often aware of a - Higher Power? How often do we sense that small still voice whispering our name?
We have heightened awareness of our distractions. They seem to flow in patterns. Could it be the voice of God within? As human beings one of our deepest longings is to belong. Being “taken” is to belong. When we take time in quiet meditation, we should be able to be aware of God communing with us. In some ways it is like two lovers who can be present to one another without verbal words passing between them.

Blessed: “As the Beloved children of God, we are blessed. I am increasingly aware of how much we fearful, anxious, insecure human beings are in need of a blessing.” I recall how, when my children were younger, in Grammar School and High School, that I would pray a blessing over them as they left for school each morning. There was always the danger of bullying.
Life has changed, but the need for blessings remains. I look for new ways to bless them and others.
One Blessing that I received, impromptu and very unexpectedly was on a camping retreat with several of my “Brothers in Christ”. It happened when my brothers who were on retreat with me; saw what was happening and the stressed look on my face. During a break, they gathered around me and asked if I wanted to be prayed over. I welcomed the opportunity. They each prayed from their heart and laid hands on my shoulders. I came away from that experience feeling the strength of community and a reset focus to continue the retreat. I truly felt Blest.
The blessings that we give to each other are expressions of the blessing that rests on us from all eternity.
I am sure that all of you remember, if you made a Cornerstone Experience, how we would pray a blessing over each witness before they shared their talk.

Blessings are sometimes informal. An example might be when we affirm one another after a time of prayer and/or sharing. Or it might be a follow up phone call detailing how someone’s sharing had touched us.

Broken:

We are all broken. “Our brokenness is so visible and tangible, so concrete and specific that it is difficult to believe that we are chosen and blessed.” Our brokenness appears in many forms. For me it often shows up in my loneliness, in my sense of isolation, in my fears and in my general insecurity. I have no college degrees, yet I journey with others who have master’s degrees and PHDs. My spirit can often drift into a sense of brokenness.
Some of the times in my life when my spirit has been broken are when I failed out of college and did not know where to turn.
Another was in my experience of rejection when I attempted to enter a Religious Community after getting out of the Navy.
Another was in the struggles of letting go of my hopes and dreams after Carolyn went home to be with Our Lord.  
In each of these my spirit was broken. There were moments of depression and confusion. But down deep in my spiritual roots, I knew that God would use these experiences to a fruitful end. I had to learn to let go.

Given:

“The fourth aspect of the life of the Beloved is to be given. In the giving it becomes clear that we are chosen, blessed, and broken not simply for our own sakes, but so that all we live finds its final significance in its being lived for others. Our greatest fulfillment lies in giving ourselves to others.”
There are two experiences of being given in my life that come to mind. The first was in my Wedding to Carolyn. Part of our journey had a restart after I got out of the US Navy and she got out of the Convent – Sisters of Christian Charity. It was in the Spring of 1966. We started dating again and looked for new meaning in life. We were engaged on March 10th in 1968. We set our plans for our wedding. Then her Father died on her birthday, just weeks before the wedding. Also, her Grandparents were killed in a car accident a week later. She had nobody who cared about her accept me. So, in a sense, we were given to each other.

The second was in taking vows of Poverty, Chastity and Humility and
re-Consecrating my life to Jesus through my Community of Immaculate Conception in Annandale, N.J. This was just a few months after Carolyn went home to be with Our Lord.

Living as the Beloved:

My journey of living as the beloved has unfolded in the second half of my life in amazing ways. It started in a big way when Carolyn and I had been involved in starting many ministries at Immaculate Conception Parish. Then it took a big step forward when we led the teams of Men’s and Women’s Cornerstone at ICC. We shared our love and energy with many people in our parish. We had the sense of being taken, blessed, broken, and given as bread for the world. We informally consecrated or life to our parish.
After Carolyn went home to be with our Lord, I continued to live a consecrated life. I took vows of Poverty, Chastity and Humility. I have remained active in many ministries as I try to live out my vows.
“The unfathomable mystery of God is that God is a lover who wants to be loved. The one who created us is waiting for our response to the love that gave us our being. God not only says: “You are my Beloved.” God also asks: “Do you love me?” and offers us countless chances to say “Yes.” That is the spiritual life: the chance to say “Yes” to our inner truth.”

Reflection and Sharing: How am I saying YES in this stage of my life?